Showing Your Personal Side Without Sacrificing Your Privacy | Episode 102

Hello hello and welcome back to the Purpose & Progress Podcast.

Before we dive into this week’s episode, I want to shoutout the Toward Purpose & Progress Newsletter. I send it every Tuesday and it’s full of business building insights, shoutouts to Founder Friends, and other juicy snippets. Plus podcast updates, of course. It’s always valuable and values-driven. I’d love to have you in my online orbit and be in actual conversation, so go ahead and sign up at ashleesang.com/orbit. It’s also always linked in the shownotes.

Anyway, today we’re talking about finding the balance between the private and public parts of yourself in an online business or any sort of public-facing personal brand. Because I absolutely believe there’s a way (or a million different ways) to show your personal side without sacrificing your privacy. And that personal touch, that human element is SO essential when it comes to empathetic, conscious, human-first marketing and business.

As online business owners, we often hear how we need to lean into the personal side of business. You know the advice: “Get personal.” “Share parts of your life.” “Show behind the scenes.”

But it’s scary to put yourself online. Especially if you’re an introvert, or just don’t want your business (literally and metaphorically) out in the open like that.

The good news is, there’s a way to show your personal side in your online business WITHOUT sacrificing your privacy.

Because having a point of view and a brand personality matters. Whether you’re founder-forward, have a team, or simply want to create a brand that resonates with the exact people you’re aiming to reach, you need to show off what makes you and your brand unique.

Humanizing your brand and showcasing your values creates connection, encourages trust, and builds long-term loyalty. All things we want and need for an impactful business that actually feels good to run.

So, where do we draw the line between personal and professional as a business owner?

Do you need to show every meal you eat, every baby photo you take, every time you ugly cry, every dollar you earn, every fight with your spouse, or every vacation you go on? Nope, nope, nope all around. Unless you want to.

Instead, decide what feels comfortable to you, what’s relatable to your ideal audience, and what aligns with your brand values. If it checks these boxes, go ahead and share. If not, you have a guilt-free pass to keep that part of yourself private.

If you’re curious and want an example, I talk about what I do personally and where those lines are for me later in this episode.

And as you figure out which parts of yourself and your world view to reveal and which to hold close, it might be useful to think in categories. And even of the following categories, you get to decide whether, how much, and how often to share.

Category 1: Personal Interests

This is essentially what lights you up. (Besides building a business that has amazing impact and results in meaningful, confident action toward your goals, of course.)

Think:

✧ favorite foods, meals you experiment with, or restaurants you frequent

✧ lifestyle or daily rhythm snippets

✧ travel tales or photos

✧ snapshots of your personal style or home

✧ humor—either share what you find hilarious, or crack your own jokes to show off your own sense of humor

✧ insight into your cultural background, political or religious beliefs, or other layers of your identity (yes, you can absolutely talk about traditionally off-limits hot topics — does it get more human that this? Your people don’t have to have these elements in common with you to be able to respect and appreicate them. And if they are off-put by the parts of yourself that you hold so dear, is that really the type of person you want to work with? For you to decide.)

✧ references to regional particularities (Ope, looking at your midwesterners…if you know you know what I just did there.)

✧ your tastes in pop culture (even if it’s cringe-y…most of us like it too, or can gently tease you for it!)

Category 2: Hobbies

What do you do outside of work? Sometimes our hobbies or the communities we’re part of beyond the realm of online business give us the best stories to share or lessons learned.

And you never know—your ideal client might also be into miniature replicas of scenes from 19th century British literature like you are. Or kayaking. Or thrifting. Or brain teaser puzzles.

Imagine the conversations you can have if they are! (Books are always a big conversation starter with people in my orbit, which checks out—library pun intended—since the women I know are deep thinking, super smart, and appreciate a good turn of phrase.)

Category 3: Personal Struggles and Triumphs

The waters can get really murky here, but sharing about challenges or big wins can also accelerate that sense of connection and trust because it can be deeply vulnerable and therefore deeply resonant.

But tread lightly. I recommend avoiding sharing anything that’s still triggering to you, that you haven’t processed fully, or that you don’t know how you’d reply if someone said something you didn’t want to hear.

For example, if a divorce or pregnancy loss or bankruptcy or whatever else is too fresh, don’t put yourself on blast like that. Keep those personal struggles to yourself or confined to private conversations. But if you’ve navigated through a setback and have insights you want to share, or it’s a wound that’s scarred over and is important to how you show up in your life and with your clients, then maybe do put it out there. I’ve personally found in recent years that the more I share (often in private conversations, but still outside of my own head and heart), the more permission-giving it is for others to do the same.

You can share a health journey, a peek into your relationships (family, friends, clients, etc.), your fears, your dreams, progress on whatever skills or certifications you’re working toward, income or other business milestones.

And it doesn’t have to be dire straits if that’s not your brand vibe. You can also keep it super light.

Share successes like a good workout, getting your kid to bed on the first try, making it through one day without checking social media. Or share minor bumps in the road like missing the ferry that morning, spilling your coffee, or sending out a dead link to 456 of your closest friends in your latest email.

Category 4: Business Journey

This might seem obvious, but are you sharing your progress as a brand or business owner? Are you sharing client transformations or customer reviews and how those kind words make you feel? Are you sharing mindset shifts, partnerships gone wrong (or ones that are the perfect fit), or your vision for your business? Are you sharing everything that goes into delivering your offer or product?

Some of this behind-the-scenes insight might feel inappropriate if you want to keep an air of professionalism, polish, or prestige. But it might be exactly what your clients need to hear before knowing that you’re the right choice for them.

Category 5: Inspo

Think about what inspires you and/or what would be inspirational to your ideal audience. You can either go the curated route, or the creation route.

With the former, simply post photos or quotes that you’ve curated from around the internet or whatever content you’re consuming—books, movies, TV shows, music, art. I do this often in my newsletter and my Conscious Marketing, Curated subscription. Both are linked. With the latter, create content (videos, graphics, emails, etc.) that leverages your own words of encouragement.

Category 6: Family

This is a big one that people either love to share or keep close to the chest. Decide (ideally with the consent of the people involved) whether giving a glimpse into your home life is something you’d like the internet to know about. Why? Because beyond work, family is often where we put the most time, energy, and thought, so it makes sense that this is a direct window into your values.

With these 6 categories in mind, I personally oscillate between them, sharing much more from some than others. Here are just a few examples of where I draw the line on what I share and what I keep for myself.

It took me MONTHS before I was willing to post a photo—or gasp, an IG Story!—with my face. I felt weird and self-conscious and like I didn’t have anything anyone wanted to hear. But I started sharing here or there, but gradually my feed was sprinkled with my face and I chatted on Stories nearly daily. (I’ve since taken a huge step back from Instagram, so this has ebbed and flowed.) There are definitely faceless accounts that do great though. Find what works for you.

In terms of my health and lifestyle, I waited until I was 8+ months pregnant both times before sharing it. And I only posted about it because I was anticipating going dark for a few months, so I wanted to offer an explanation up front. (That didn’t happen either time…because #solopreneurlife and being a Type A Enneagram 1.) Since becoming a mom, I talk about motherhood often, but I never mention my kids’ names or show their faces on the internet. I’m in the strictly private camp on those fronts. I will sometimes show scenes from their playtime or little pieces of their body that aren’t identifying to give clues into our life, but don’t feel invasive. And that works for our family, while still connecting me with LOADS of amazing parent and caregiver entrepreneurs out there.

In terms of other lifestyle elements, I often share anecdotes from conversations with friends or real-life experiences that I feel relate to business. [*In my free newsletter and the Conscious Marketing, Curated subscription, which includes reflections, rants, and resources you’ll likely find useful! Both are linked in the shownotes.*] I’ll occasionally mention a fun thrifted outfit or item from Senegal (where I lived for 4 years and my husband is from), one of my many daily walks, or things I’m reading, listening to, or watching. These feel personal enough, light, fun, and connective, without being too revealing.

I also sometimes share about my later-in-life Type 1 diabetes diagnosis, but never in much detail. And I mention my recent ADHD diagnosis on the podcast a lot because it feels much more inner circle, but I haven’t mentioned it on LinkedIn very often because that feels a bit too revealing or not “safe” enough…yet.

I talk about money often, in fact, I have a whole podcast playlist about Values-Aligned Money, which I’ll link in the shownotes. And I’ll share my prices openly—they were listed publicly on my website until very recently since I’m currently experimenting with my pricing. But I never share specific revenue stats from my business. Just feels too vulnerable. And that’s ok.

None of this is right or wrong or set in stone. It’s how I feel in any given moment and in relation to what I think people in my orbit want or need or will accept from me.

It’s up to you to establish your own boundaries. There is no right or wrong way to show up and get personal, as long as it aligns with your values and your comfort level.

And that comfort level is also flexible. Mai-kee from Episode 56 is all about NOT pushing your comfort level and marketing within the bounds your own safety zones. But if you thrive in pushing limits and challenging yourself, then step the edge of or even outside that circle of “safety” and maybe you’ll find it was more of an illusion or a false limit than you thought.

Regardless, showing up is an exercise. Choose what you’re comfortable putting on the internet without it feeling like it oversteps any boundaries. Today, in this moment. Lean into that and ignore the rest. And try something different tomorrow. Or build up that “sharing muscle” slowly as your community and comfort-level grow. You can always scale back if a negative experience happens, you enter a new phase of life or business, or you just plain change your mind.

Also, if you don’t have much of an audience now because you haven’t been sharing much on social, in a newsletter, on a podcast, in YouTube videos—wherever your online playground is—then now is the perfect time to experiment. When the reach and therefore the stakes are low. You can find what feels resonant to you while also seeing what might end up growing an audience as you go.

All this to say, I encourage you to start sharing what’s personal, but not necessarily what’s private. Anything that feels right. Not everything you could or “should” be.

And a little logistics note: If you don’t already have one, I highly recommend you have a content bank to easily capture ideas whenever you come across them. Otherwise, they’ll spark inspiration in the moment, but you’ll either forget or be unable to find it again when it’s time to share. It’s also great to have a searchable bank of content for repurposing in the future. I have a template in Notion that I use, and it’s capable of collaborative with any team members or contractors. Just send me an email or voice memo and I can send you a copy.

So, as we wrap up, remember that when it comes to showing up, you do you. It doesn’t matter what or how much other people are sharing. Show up only in the ways that feel good to you. That energy and intention will shine through to your audience and connect in just the right way. Which is the goal, after all.

And I’d love to know via DM or voice memo: what are your favorite things to share in your content, or your always-off-limits topics that will never see the light of day?

If you loved this episode, please do leave a glowing review, subscribe, and share a screenshot on social so that more multi-passionate deep thinkers know about the podcast!

Be sure to check out all the resources in the show notes below or at ashleesang.com/episode102.

And come back next time (in 2 weeks!) because we’ll be in conversation with another ambitious and inspirational woman entrepreneur.